Iam not going to die !!!!

Quick note about me I had a shitty, really shitty childhood but Iam not getting into that right now. My relationships have been fucking awful, with the exception of my current marriage. My health always something fucking weird always happening, so honestly not sure if I’d categorize myself as healthy but I think Iam. Iam in good shape, workout a lot and eat healthy but the doctors always find something wrong. This fucking year has been torture!! I am on my second marriage and I would have liked to have a baby with him but that is not going to happen. We tried everything sex everyday, me on top , him on top legs up , legs down, on the pillow, doggy style, he’ll even another girl to get him really fired up, but this is for another day. My crazy roller coaster ride of poor health all started 3C2B6B25-686D-4C6E-9C7B-9E3C433803F0.jpegabout December of fucking 2017. Which leads me to today, on June 16th I go to great adventure with my New friend and our daughters. Oh so I don’t have many friends women don’t seem to like me like I give a fuck , so anyway it was nice when Lisa is my new friends name asked me to go to great adventure. Anyway I go and I get on this roller coaster ride from hell and it beat the shit out of me , Iam 40 years old and not an old lady 40 like a 25 year old 40 lol so I get off of this death contraption and instant pain. In my head I’m like omg Iam not feeling good but also saying Iris don’t be a little bitch, so I push on in pain 3 more fucking roller coasters because Iam a fucking retard. Yeah good idea “not” finally Iam like ok Iam done we in agreement go to a local pool. Iam driving with this pain that is getting worse and worse get to the pool my daughter has to help me into my bathing suit, I sit by the pool trying to relax but this shit felt like I was thrown from a building. Iam in so much pain I can’t get my bathing suit off and I pretend like I’m jut to tired to change lol and drive home in my batching suit. Get out of the car crying my husband and daughter help me upstairs fucking crazy right , this from a roller coaster. My husband takes off my bathing suit puts me in bed and runs to the store to get me meds and a neck brace , this is serious fucking pain; by the way my husband is pretty wonderful. The next day still in pain he rushes me to the hospital, they take CT scans with and without contrast , doctor comes in say looks good just some whip lash here’s some meds go home rest, ok great! We get home and 20 mins later get a call from the doctor hi Iris you need to come back to the ER we found something, the “team” is waiting for you so you can do a STAT MRA , hum ok what the fuck is happening…. I have the MRA and they diagnose me with a dissection of the artery located in the c3, c4 kinda close to my fucking brain, they tell me they can’t help me I have to go to the trauma unit at Jefferson in Philadelphia all the while I’m thinkimg what the fuck is a dissection!! Another ambulance comes rushes me to trauma in Jefferson hospital, rushed through the doors of the hospital into this crazy room with lights and neurosurgeons, trauma surgeons and radiologists. Imagine sitting there, not knowing your diagnosis and everyone coming up and putting there hand on your shoulder and  saying do you know why your here ugh no you fucking asshole I don’t know. Finally after everyone making me feel like I’m going to die leaves me alone for a second I call a doctor over and ask why am I here lol  He says oh because you have a dissection of your vertebral artery in the back of your neck at the c4 , your artery in case you may not know consists of 4 layers and two of which in this case were severed on impact which meant I could be internally bleeding or have a stroke at some point. So major observations were needed possible surgery hence neurosurgeons. Oh ok thanks for this information let me process my possible fucking death… Soooo all night people are poking me talking to me, asking me to walk talk ect, my husband brings me clothes and we’re waiting for  them to move me to stroke victims unit, at this point I have been at the hospital since 9:30 am it is now 1am. We are so tired and there’s crazy shit happening around us in the trauma unit like drunk people who fell from balconies and broke there necks, dudes who got the shit beat out of them , I mean nuckles where you can see the bone because they taught so hard to try to stay alive. Finally at 2am a woman comes over and says oh so there seems to be no dissection you can go home, wtf are you talking about. I go home angry, distraught and afraid to go to sleep because all day I was being checked for hemorrhaging and stroking , great and no one gave me any diagnosis or explanation. Next day I call my doctor go in and he’s like oh but it’s saying you still have the dissection ugh! Can anyone get this right, now Iam thinking great I went home and I could have been ready to stroke any minute. Iam sent for another MRA , can’t wait for these results, test finally comes  back : diagnosis fenestration of the vertebral artery ok again what the hell is that ?? You’ll never believe it , no one can answer what that means , of course that would be to easy ,but it could be very serious. Ugh back to Jefferson neurosurgeons fuck my life, here I go again . Iam in the office just waiting for the next batch of bad news , nope not this time my beautiful angel of a doctor lol tells me no dissection, just fenestration the placement is not bad and all it is , is a fusing of 2 arteries most cases do not require any medical assistance, just go live your life but she wants to repeat the MRA in 4 months to be safe. Apparently this fusing is rare , it happens at birth and in many cases is not a problem. Thank,you Jesus for today !! Today was a great day because Iam not afraid that I might die , or that I may never see my daughter and husband ever again , I won’t be afraid to go to sleep tonight. I guess today was my lucky day !!

Author: Iarnold

I just realized I never told you a little about me, in my first post I warned you that Iam a unpolished, not reserved at all and definitely no filter. I want to write just as I speak because I want to be relatable and also to be my true self. I don’t want to give away to much in my writing as Iam writing a book that will touch on my past struggles and how I got to where Iam today, I hope if you do end up with a copy I can give you all a little incite into my book through my blogging. I hope that my writing can make you laugh, cry and help. Sometimes we all need a little truth to get our shit right. I know I do !!